Social Solo-Butterfly
The social solo-butterfly requires two things: self-confidence and drinking. Do not be fooled, quaffing of a draft will not assist in social awkwardness in a public situation. Let’s get into the thick of things: drinking by yourself can be done in a tasteful way where the roaming eye of patrons doesn’t target you. There are strict rules to drinking alone, a guideline has been provided.
1. Pick an acceptable time – just like capturing the rays of a summer’s sun, timing is everything. Lunch hours, after work, and before the witching hour are all acceptable drinking time slots.
2. Choose the watering hole wisely – you do not want to go to a bar that doesn’t cater to the solo-cup holder. If you are in a new city strategically case the bar area, this can be done by using the restroom first. Never under any circumstances tie yourself down with a drink before you lay an eye on the horizon. Be casual and survey the scene, then order.
3. Rule 2/3 are interchangeable and target the layout of the bar area. A key to solo drinking is picking a seat that doesn’t put you in the center of activity but also doesn’t summon you to the corner. Commit to a location near a TV or at an angle that you can take in more then one monitor. Engaging in the surroundings allows you to blend in and gives your eyes a point of reference.
4. Supplies are necessary – bring the following: (1) modified reading literature – if you are on a work related trip something to browse or lose your gaze in for a few moments…nothing exceedingly large or important should be brought to the bar stool. (2) a mobile device* – a blackberry or iphone is an acceptable accessory for checking a quick email and also following up on a news event/checking what time the game starts. (3) *do not use your mobile device whilst at the bar – it’s in poor form to carry on a conversation over thirty seconds at a bar. If they were really that interested they’d be drinking with you and, reverting back to rule 1, self confidence is key, you don’t want patrons to think you are using a crutch.
5. Do not, under any circumstances engage the bartender in a long, drawn out conversation. Bartenders are just that, tenders of the bar. They are not ‘stand-in’ friends or a resource to current events. Brief words and friendly accolades are fine but a discussion of importance should not be solicited.
6. Speaking to other bar patrons is touch-and-go, and based on situation and need, the people sitting next to you could be a source of entertainment. ByUrself’s general rule is to remain somewhat aloof, not looking or denying the commencement of conversation. Other solo drinkers are usually confident enough to at least acknowledge each others presence and can gauge approval rating.
7. If a solo patron begins acting rowdy, remove yourself from their presence. You do not want to be associated with the town drunk and a new bar/situation could put you at a disadvantage. You do not want to plague yourself with their problems so if this situation arises, move seats in a strategy to ‘better see the TV screen’ or move bars entirely.
8. While drinking alone, do not order a round of shots for the bartenders. This action will only solidify your need for approval and create skepticism. If someone offers you a drink however, feel free to take it in the name of humanity.
9. If you are in a foreign location, do not offend the local yocals by wearing your teams baseball hat and or jersey on their turf – unless of course you are looking for a fight. This rule is only relevant in tense cities such as Boston and New York. This rule also only applies if you are drinking solo. It may sound interesting to create a stir but if you are truly on a solo flight, it’s better to attract attention to yourself in a positive light.
10. “Joe from Canada” – number ten rule is key to a smooth solo experience. If you are from out of town, don’t feel compelled to tell everyone present that you are, “from out of town.” Also, avoid asking people around you if they, "know your friend from middle school that moved here…I think…what was his last name?"
The social solo-butterfly requires two things: self-confidence and drinking. Do not be fooled, quaffing of a draft will not assist in social awkwardness in a public situation. Let’s get into the thick of things: drinking by yourself can be done in a tasteful way where the roaming eye of patrons doesn’t target you. There are strict rules to drinking alone, a guideline has been provided.
1. Pick an acceptable time – just like capturing the rays of a summer’s sun, timing is everything. Lunch hours, after work, and before the witching hour are all acceptable drinking time slots.
2. Choose the watering hole wisely – you do not want to go to a bar that doesn’t cater to the solo-cup holder. If you are in a new city strategically case the bar area, this can be done by using the restroom first. Never under any circumstances tie yourself down with a drink before you lay an eye on the horizon. Be casual and survey the scene, then order.
3. Rule 2/3 are interchangeable and target the layout of the bar area. A key to solo drinking is picking a seat that doesn’t put you in the center of activity but also doesn’t summon you to the corner. Commit to a location near a TV or at an angle that you can take in more then one monitor. Engaging in the surroundings allows you to blend in and gives your eyes a point of reference.
4. Supplies are necessary – bring the following: (1) modified reading literature – if you are on a work related trip something to browse or lose your gaze in for a few moments…nothing exceedingly large or important should be brought to the bar stool. (2) a mobile device* – a blackberry or iphone is an acceptable accessory for checking a quick email and also following up on a news event/checking what time the game starts. (3) *do not use your mobile device whilst at the bar – it’s in poor form to carry on a conversation over thirty seconds at a bar. If they were really that interested they’d be drinking with you and, reverting back to rule 1, self confidence is key, you don’t want patrons to think you are using a crutch.
5. Do not, under any circumstances engage the bartender in a long, drawn out conversation. Bartenders are just that, tenders of the bar. They are not ‘stand-in’ friends or a resource to current events. Brief words and friendly accolades are fine but a discussion of importance should not be solicited.
6. Speaking to other bar patrons is touch-and-go, and based on situation and need, the people sitting next to you could be a source of entertainment. ByUrself’s general rule is to remain somewhat aloof, not looking or denying the commencement of conversation. Other solo drinkers are usually confident enough to at least acknowledge each others presence and can gauge approval rating.
7. If a solo patron begins acting rowdy, remove yourself from their presence. You do not want to be associated with the town drunk and a new bar/situation could put you at a disadvantage. You do not want to plague yourself with their problems so if this situation arises, move seats in a strategy to ‘better see the TV screen’ or move bars entirely.
8. While drinking alone, do not order a round of shots for the bartenders. This action will only solidify your need for approval and create skepticism. If someone offers you a drink however, feel free to take it in the name of humanity.
9. If you are in a foreign location, do not offend the local yocals by wearing your teams baseball hat and or jersey on their turf – unless of course you are looking for a fight. This rule is only relevant in tense cities such as Boston and New York. This rule also only applies if you are drinking solo. It may sound interesting to create a stir but if you are truly on a solo flight, it’s better to attract attention to yourself in a positive light.
10. “Joe from Canada” – number ten rule is key to a smooth solo experience. If you are from out of town, don’t feel compelled to tell everyone present that you are, “from out of town.” Also, avoid asking people around you if they, "know your friend from middle school that moved here…I think…what was his last name?"
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